So, the question still stands, “DO you want to live an authentic life?" What would it take? What changes do you need to make?
It all begins with the way we think. “If you keep doing what you're doing, you'll keep getting what you're getting." You've got to change something for something to change. If you sincerely feel that it's time to remove the mask(s), then you must ask yourself some serious questions:
- What mask have I been wearing when at work?
- What mask have I been wearing when with different family members?
- What mask have I been wearing when with friends?
- What mask do I wear when I go to church?
- Why have I been wearing these masks? What has been the pay-off?
- What difference will it make when I remove all masks and begin to live as my authentic self?
- Who am I, really?
Having spent 2 days last weekend with my dear friend, Katie, was an interesting experience. Having moved across the country three (3) years ago, it was refreshing for me to start a new life in a new place. I could really be me! No one knew me or knew of my past life. It was all fresh, inviting, free and exciting. I was free to be me! I know that many of you understand what I am saying here. It's not that I had a 'hidden past' – not at all – but I did have experiences, a reputation, a family, relationships, pain etc. that I left behind. In my new life, I was creating what I wanted, on a daily basis – in life and in business. I know that many people, deep in their hearts, would want to have the same opportunity.
Then, to have my friend of 35 years walk through the door – bringing with her all the memories, experiences, adventures, etc. of our 'past' with her – well, that was a bit unsettling for me (at first). I had mixed feelings of joy and pain, as all the memories came rushing back through my mind. Those emotions caught me off guard. They were short-lived, but did cause me to stop and think for a bit. That's what it will feel like for many of you once you decide to take off the masks that you wear on a daily basis. It's unsettling and exciting, all at the same time. Life is a rush!
When you make the decision to create some changes in your life, that's when the 4 major barriers raise their ugly little heads....habits, attitudes, beliefs and expectations. When you decide to live an authentic life, core beliefs will stare you in the face and it may become overwhelming to get past them. There are techniques for doing so – I've done it, and so can you!
One of the first steps to take is to begin to love yourself for who you are. I can remember sitting in church one Mother's Day, many years ago. I really didn't like Mother's Day much because, as a step-mother, it can be a challenging 'event'. I was sitting there, feeling sorry for myself, because all the mothers were being acknowledged with accolades and flowers, etc. In those days, there was very little reference to the role of a step-mother and, when there was, typically it was in a negative sense. The Youth Pastor was giving the sermon that day and I really felt he was speaking directly to me when he said the words, 'Remember, God doesn't make any junk!" Wow! “Are you speaking to me?" I thought. I left church that day with a whole different mindset and feeling really good about myself because, as the great step-mother that I knew I was, I began to feel very good about myself and the difference I was making in the lives of my step-children. What a relief to know, and feel, that I could just be ME!
When I took my trip around the world, it was most interesting to experience, and get to know, some of the people in the different cultures. In Cambodia, for instance (where I left my heart), there are no masks – in fact, many of the people don't even have clothes! Can you imagine what life would be like, here, if we were totally exposed like that, in all ways on every day? One of my lasting memories, having visited the villages, was the sound of laughter and joy that permeated the air. Just imagine what our lives would be like if that was our focus? (Want to have that experience too? If you'd like more information on these trips, contact my friend, Ben, President, Travel Guild at 1.800.268.4284)
So, if you can just recognize all the goodness within you, and celebrate the gift that you are to this world, it's easy to live an authentic life. It's a lesson I learned by changing some core beliefs about myself. You can do it too!
If you're not feeling sure of 'who you are' these days because of what is going on in your life, I'd recommend you make some changes starting today. I am hosting a special 2-day retreat, in London, for women who would like to figure out who they are and what they want to be 'when they grow up'.
Steps2Happiness Assignment
- Take inventory of your life – how does it feel? What does it look like? Are you happy?
- Are you still wearing your masks? Are you suffocating?
- Visualize what your life would be like without a mask, in each and every situation you encounter. How would THAT feel?
- Take one more step, today, to live an authentic life. Write down, and use my affirmation, “I am authentic, effective and progressive in my day to day life."
- For more photos of my trip around the world, and to read my stories, visit www.travelblog.org/bloggers/Happy-Pat/
